Monthly Archives: July 2014

The worst way of flying, I think, is sta

The worst way of flying, I think, is standby. It never works. That’s why they call it standby. You end up standing there going, ‘Bye!’

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I don’t want to hear the specials. If t

I don’t want to hear the specials. If they’re so special, put ’em on the menu. Jerry Seinfeld

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A bookstore is one of the only pieces of

A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking. Jerry Seinfeld

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There are two sides to every story, and

There are two sides to every story, and sometimes three, four, and five. Bill Cosby

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Any man today who returns from work, sin

Any man today who returns from work, sinks into a chair, and calls for his pipe is a man with an appetite for danger. Bill Cosby

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You know the only people who are always

You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who’ve never had any. Bill Cosby

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Sex education may be a good idea in the

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don’t believe the kids should be given homework. Bill Cosby

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Human beings are the only creatures on e

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. Bill Cosby

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Let us now set forth one of the fundamen

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. Bill Cosby

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A word to the wise ain’t necessary – it

A word to the wise ain’t necessary – it’s the stupid ones that need the advice. Bill Cosby

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